Scars (again)

Looking back at my first blogs since moving to Rwanda, I’ve realized that not just myself but several other peoples first blogs about moving to Rwanda were about scars. The complete openness of past tragedy and open lament is really foreign to Americans. This is one of the first things many people notice when they first arrive here. I think this is due to stark contrast and how different it is from America. Past hardships and physical scars are typically concealed, covered or attempted to forget about but these hardships have to go somewhere. Rwanda is quite the opposite to America when it comes to the lament. Many people cannot hide their constant reminder of a past suffering which I think is ok for many people. I think Rwanda has properly grieved its hardships and is ready to move forward. It does not want to forget about previous injustices but is ready to move on in a better light due to the fact that it has openly dealt with what it has.

I think this is a great lesson the Rwandese can teach Americans, and in my opinion especially Christians. How many times have you walked into church with the weight of the world on your shoulders, only to see a lot of people with smiling faces and the image of not a care in the world. Times for sorrow and lament are reserved for specific Sundays accompanied with a particular message. I don’t think this façade is healthy. As a community and individually we need to learn how to properly grieve loss, heartache and injustice. I think we carry our scars on the inside. The feeling and emotions are stuck and not worked out. I don’t think this lets up live to our full potential. I don’t think we can fully heal if we don’t lament.

I know I’m not in the states but overseas the Wikileaks documents about the massive amount of torture and abuse committed in Iraq was a big deal. Even in my village people would ask me how I felt as an American about the documents. My only response is deep deep sorrow mixed with some anger. When I talked to my parents and asked them what the reaction was in America, they told me that there wasn’t much of one. I think this is due to our denial and inability to lament. The injustices committed in Iraq are wrong and I believe we need to properly mourn what happened and is currently happening in Afghanistan. We need to address what’s wrong and bring to light. We can’t banish these atrocities from our consciousness, trying our best to hide the gruesome images of what we have done. I think we will be better off if we were more real with ourselves and with the rest of the world and talked about what is happening.

Rwanda has created a space to lament. From the countless mass graves scattered across the tiny country to the open fresh mortar shell wounds almost displayed across the west side of Parliament, Rwanda is healing. Let’s deal with our own story, let’s dive deep into the muck, speak it out, resonate with community and move forward with the visible scars of life and the wholesomeness of properly lamenting.

(west wall of the rwandan parliament building)

(they're keeping the scars in the building to remember)